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© 2017 DDav

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Kathrine Rethorn
I favor the idea that this poem. Definitely havent review anything prefer it. I think a couple of lines have actually to many syllables and makes that a mouth full. But if that what you were going for then store it! the all depends on how you want it come sound. That does do the reader stop and slow down, sow i wouldn"t to speak its a bad effect one of two people way. Post 3 years Ago
I like the idea that this poem. Absolutely havent read anything like it. Ns think a few lines have to numerous syllables and also makes the a mouth full. But if that what you to be going for then keep it! the all depends on how you want it to sound. That does make the leader stop and also slow down, sow ns wouldn"t speak its a bad effect one of two people way.
Rating /100
1 the 1 human being found this evaluation constructive.

3 years Ago
I"m glad i wasn"t the just one. You"re for this reason right about "mouthful" and too "many syllables" thing. W.. Check out moreI"m glad ns wasn"t the just one. You"re so right around "mouthful" and also too "many syllables" thing. Word economy is normally really dear to me; this poem is kinda s****y in the regard. I expect you continue to never ever hesitate to allude out flaws. This site has actually a trouble with that entirety "thin skinned" bias thing.

3 years Ago
Also, I"d bet you read something favor this before. Even s****y writing like this is constantly contriv.. Check out moreAlso, I"d bet you read something favor this before. Also s****y writing like this is always contrived.

Reviews


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Nipplegrinder
Started strong, gained wordy, perfect strong. Well intentioned piece, mang.Posted 3 years Ago
Started strong, got wordy, perfect strong. Well intentioned piece, mang.
Rating /100
1 of 1 civilization found this evaluation constructive.
3 year Ago
Thanks for discussing the wordy thing. Word economy used to be toughness of mine, I require to acquire ba.. Review moreThanks for pointing out the wordy thing. Word economy used come be stamin of mine, I must get ago to that. I"m means to lazy to solve this thing, but your comment will assist remind me in the future.
Kathrine Rethorn
I choose the idea the this poem. Absolutely havent check out anything prefer it. I think a few lines have to plenty of syllables and makes the a mouth full. But if that what you were going because that then store it! the all depends on how you wanted it come sound. The does do the reader stop and slow down, sow ns wouldn"t say its a negative effect either way. Posted 3 year Ago
I like the idea that this poem. Absolutely havent read anything favor it. Ns think a few lines have to many syllables and makes that a mouth full. But if the what you to be going because that then store it! that all counts on exactly how you wanted it to sound. The does do the leader stop and also slow down, sow ns wouldn"t say its a poor effect one of two people way.
Rating /100
1
that 1 world found this evaluation constructive.
3 year Ago
I"m glad i wasn"t the just one. You"re for this reason right about "mouthful" and too "many syllables" thing. W.. Review moreI"m glad ns wasn"t the only one. You"re so right about "mouthful" and too "many syllables" thing. Word economy is normally very dear come me; this city is kinda s****y in that regard. I hope you proceed to never ever hesitate to suggest out flaws. This site has a difficulty with that entirety "thin skinned" bias thing.
3 year Ago
Also, I"d gambling you review something prefer this before. Also s****y writing like this is always contriv.. Read moreAlso, I"d gambling you review something prefer this before. Also s****y writing choose this is always contrived.
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Added on December 2, 2017Last updated on December 3, 2017

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DDavJohnsburg, ILAbout more..Writing
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